Brave Sure is Hard Sometimes

I stole that line from one of A & B’s stories, but it is definitely true for adults too! As I write this, I only have 2 days left in my current position. I would like to say I won the lottery and will be staying home full time to take care of my family, but in reality, I have taken another position at a different company. Needless to say, this is very difficult.

In these past 2 weeks, I have gone over why I am leaving this position. I weighed the pros and cons, looked at this from all sides, relied heavily on friends and family and finally made this decision. And in all honesty, this is the hardest decision I have ever made.

Why is it so difficult? I finally found a wonderful team that gave me the opportunity to succeed at both my job AND as a Mom. They accepted all of my quirks, around my crazy mom schedule and gave me the confidence to realize that I am good at my job. As, some of you know, finding good co-workers can make all of the difference in the world.

So, why leave? Good question – one I have asked myself many times over the last month. Because I couldn’t be 100% Mom and 100% Jean the worker. I was living at hotels, racking up airline miles, checking my BlackBerry every 5 minutes, MIA for the month of June and basically getting the job done. But I was also saying good night to A & B over the phone, missing softball games, not picking them up from school, and not being Mommy.

I (hopefully) have found a position where I can be both 100% Mommy and 100% Jean the worker. No travel is required, hours are pretty basic, I am no longer a manager, and I give up the BlackBerry. I just hope I am lucky enough to have great co-workers.

My hubby asked me this morning how I was feeling about leaving. I told him that 7 years ago (pre A & B), I would have loved the travel, been thrilled to have the BlackBerry (aka – I am important) and on the path to VP. Now…I am just happy to read bedtime stories and cook up a frozen pizzas.

Have my priorities changed? Yes. Will I regret this decision? Who knows? But while leaving my work family is difficult, so is hearing “Mommy we miss you and don’t forget to get us gifts before you come home.” And knowing that I will continue to rush from work to school to practice, instead of rushing to catch an airplane, makes my decision just a little easier.

Has anyone ever faced a similar decision?  I would be interested to hear about your situation.

Have a great day!

Jean Anne