Monday, June 13, 2011

A Gift for Mommy

Well, it's official. I'm writing my very first blog from my brand new iPad!

This weekend my husband surprised me and decided to go out and get the iPad I have been craving for the past year. My husband knows that unless he goes out and makes a big dollar purchase like this for me. I'll never go out and do it myself.

When I became a Mom a strange thing happened to me: I developed a BIG case of buyer's remorse whenever I buy something for myself. Sure its common for Moms to put the needs of their children first, but for me its sad to say but shopping (for myself) lost all fun once I had kids.

I have yet to fully figure out why this happened to me. Historically, I am a die hard shopper, the reason they developed mugs that say "Shop-o-holic". In fact I heard the quote: "Mandi, you have champagne taste on a beer budget" so many times from my Dad it was my "middle name". In college and law school all I did was shop: designer handbags, clothes galore, a bunch of stuff I didn't need but still wanted anyway. I had my hair colored every 6 weeks like my stylist recommended, and I loved hitting the malls.

Of course, as you can probably predict, this love of shopping led to mountains of debt that I had to carry into my marriage. I'm surprised Todd did not up and run the first time he saw my "bottom line".

But alas he didn't run, and in fact whipped my horrible financial self into shape and paid off all that old debt. Our kids then arrived, and I went completely to the other extreme: from an avid shopper to someone who rarely buys anything for myself. Something changed in me. Perhaps it was the reality that I was responsible for the tiny baby in my arms. This responsibility made me feel guilty if I dropped a few hundred in the mall on one purse. Why would I do that, when I could be using that money to buy stuff for my adorable daughter??

And thus I went from one extreme to the other, and I'm trying to find a happy medium somewhere in the middle. Sure I shouldn't go out and blow our hard earned money on stuff for me, but there really is no reason that I shouldn't splurge on myself every now and again.

Finding this happy medium has not been easy for me. Even though my "beer budget" has risen a bit over the years to a "bottle of decent table wine budget" my taste has changed. And now, if I do break down and buy something for myself I am left with horrible guilt.

What is even more strange is that I don't have this guilt at all when I buy things for my kids. A trampoline for the back yard, Matilda Jane clothes, and a ton of Monster Trucks. Somehow buying for my kids silences my guilt.

So, when it comes to me now, I do what I did with the and talk and TALK about it until finally my husband steps in. He finds it funny that I spend less money now then when we first started off making hardly anything. It's ironic but the man who came into my life, paid off my debt, and got me on the right track financially is the one that reminds me that I have to splurge on myself rom time to time.

So if I am debating a purchase, and Todd knows we can afford it, he'll go off and "pull the band-aid" for me. That way he knows I'll get what I want and if I'm complaining when I enter the entry in the checkbook, I can always just blame him! (Now that's love right there).

So alas here I sit, with my brand new iPad compliments of my husband. I'm in absolute heaven.

Okay so I know what you are wondering: do I feel guilty? Well, I did until I spent the evening with my new toy and discovered all it can do!! Yep, I'm drowning out any guilt I might have courtesy of the ITunes and App Store! It's funny how a few games of Angry Birds can wipe out any buyer's remorse.


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