In the midst of chaos last night, KJ gave me the best gift a three year old could give his mommy. He got out of bed, came downstairs and scared the daylights out of me at about 9:15.
We have had a somewhat chaotic week. KJ transitioned from his daycare room to preschool this week. Husband and I were both working a lot at our jobs. We all got home around 7 last night, which meant a mad dash to get dinner on the table, kids in the bath and stories read. Still, I had thought KJ was fast asleep when he stepped out of the shadows of the playroom into the family room, almost causing me to drop my diet coke all over the floor.
For some reason, KJ couldn’t sleep. Now, Husband and I have very different approaches to middle-of-the-night wake up calls from our kids. Husband always puts the kids back in their beds no matter what the problem is. I’m (way) more likely to let the kids lay in our bed or rock them to sleep – especially if they are sick. Our daughter never really liked to be rocked and with the warmer weather, I haven’t had much opportunity to rock anyone lately. So I capitalized on my moment with KJ yesterday, turned on the cd I always played when rocking him as a baby, took him to the rocking chair, and rocked him.
What an amazing experience it was. We sat there, just the two of us in the dark playroom rocking and just holding each other. Preschool had been a big step for both of us. For KJ, it meant a new routine, new classroom, new friends. All changes that are hard on a three year old. For me, preschool meant another step my baby took away from me. Another milestone, already here. A reminder that my rocking days were numbered. But in the rocking chair, for just a few minutes, we could both hold onto his babyhood just a little bit longer.
When the cd was over and it was time to bring KJ up to bed, he did not protest at all. He went to sleep, just like the big boy that he is and I went back to laundry or whatever it was that I had been getting ready to do. But all night, I found myself thinking of KJ, and thanking God for my little boy. And thanking KJ for my glimpse of heaven.