A few weeks ago, I mentioned in one of my posts that we had enrolled KJ in a new hockey program for the fall. I had the best of intentions in making the switch. KJ had already done a (long) session of learn to skate, and was antsy to play real hockey, with a stick. The original program through which KJ skated was run through the United State Figure Skating Association and had a l-o-n-g learn to skate program. He was going to have to pass 5 levels of learn to skate before he was ever given a puck. That's over a year of learn to skate. Because I skated through the USFSA growing up, I knew the program was a good one and KJ would be a good skater if he completed all 5 levels. But KJ is 4. I had some serious doubts that he would even be interested in hockey if he didn't touch a stick or a puck for another year.
So, I sought out and found another rink that taught learn to skate through the USA hockey program, as opposed to the USFSA. While it still had a learn to skate component, the program was much more compact and introduced stick handling and pucks much, much earlier. I figured that if KJ passed the fall and winter sessions of learn to skate in this new program, he would be using sticks and pucks around Christmas. I knew the boy wanted a stick. So, I signed him up.
But I did not anticipate how KJ would react to the new hockey program. The old hockey program was taught at a new, modern rink that actually had several sheets of ice. There was always something going on, and he almost always got to watch a game either before or after his lesson. The old hockey program divided kids by age and ability. So most of the kids in KJ's class were around his age. And the old hockey program was taught by women. In fact, my old figure skating pro taught KJ's Sunday night lesson. The new rink is none of those things. It's a bare bones operation run by a bunch of men who are hockey coaches or retired professional hockey players who coach kids by ability, not age. It's true hockey.
KJ, as it turns out, was not ready for true hockey. The very first week of learn to skate he cried. He didn't want to go out onto the ice. He didn't like the teachers. He didn't like the whistles. And he certainly didn't like the mascot of our local professional team skating out there with him. It wasn't a complete metldown, but it wasn't what we expected either. I had taken KJ skating just 24 hours earlier and he had loved it. In my opinion, there was nothing so different at this rink so as to warrant tears. I tried to reason with KJ, tell him that this hockey would let him play with sticks sooner, but he was still upset. Eventually, I handed him - still crying - to the one woman coach and asked her to get him started. I hoped that once he started skating he'd get over the whistles and everything would be fine. She got him on the ice, saw that he could skate and sent him over to the advanced section of the learn to skate class. KJ, still crying, was on his own.
I felt like a terrible parent. I was that mom, living through her child, making him do something he clearly didn't want to do. Except, I'm not that mom. I couldn't care less if KJ plays hockey. In fact, from a financial perspective, I sort of hope he doesn't. I pushed KJ out on the ice because I know he loves hockey. Every Saturday morning since last February he has woken up, donned all of his equipment and played me in floor hockey until Sweet Pea wakes up or he gets so hungry he remembers to ask for breakfast. Believe me, there were plenty of mornings where I would have preferred to nap quietly on the couch while he played matchbox cars in the playroom. But KJ wanted to play hockey, so I did it. KJ wasn't crying because he didn't want to learn to skate, he was crying because it was different. And different is sometimes scary. But as I sat on my side of the plexi-glass watching my little guy cry through a facemask and hockey gloves, I knew that he had to get through this little bit of scary to reach his goals. That someday the salt of these tears would be replaced by the excitement of a stick. That I was doing my job as a parent in helping him face a fear.
Thankfully, KJ didn't cry on the ice for too long. A high school kid who was assisting the learn to skate program took pity on KJ and helped him calm down. He also held KJ close whenever the scary mascot skated by. He was kind to KJ. Kind in a way that he didn't have to be. Kind in a way that makes a mother grateful. By the time KJ got off the ice, he was - once again - all smiles.
Happy hockey didn't last long, however. The very next week KJ cried that he didn't want to go on the ice again. And the third week, KJ cried when he found out that his special high school friend wasn't there. Each week I'd talk to KJ, tell him that he had to finish out this session, but then he never had to play hockey again, and then I'd put him on the ice crying. And each week, I'd feel like all of the other parents were looking at me, judging. Each week, I felt like a bad mom.
Somewhere around the 4th week the crying stopped. KJ did his lesson and had a good time. And with the exception of weeks were there's a mascot on the ice or when KJ gets run over by an 8 year old, there's no more crying. But it wasn't until this last week that I knew for sure that I'd done the right thing sending KJ out on the ice all of those weeks. Last Saturday, after a learn to skate with a horse mascot that even I found disconcerting, KJ's coach told me KJ passed learn to skate entirely, and was ready to begin real hockey. With sticks and pucks.
I will never forget KJ's face when I told him the news. It was like Christmas had come early, and everything Santa brought had Bauer written on it. To say KJ was excited was an understatement. KJ wanted to skate with sticks and pucks right that very second. He was so proud of himself. And so excited to get back on the ice. It was as if those weeks of crying had never happened. My little guy was happy. He had done it.
Tomorrow, we start "real" hockey with sticks and pucks. This afternoon, we are going to the store to get his suspenders and his first real stick. I had planned on asking Santa to bring KJ a stick for Christmas, but I'm happy to be buying one for him now. KJ has truly earned this stick.
Karen
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Friday, October 21, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Tuesday: The New Friday
One of my biggest frustrations as a working parent is kid activities. Kid activities are disproportionately scheduled during weekday working hours. Few classes are offered in evenings, and those that are usually begin right at 5. For someone like me, there is no possible way I can get my kids to a ballet class or hockey lesson by 5 pm. To be anywhere by 5 I'd have to leave work at 3:30. That simply is not happening. So every season, I'm challenged with finding and scheduling all lessons/sports/classes for Saturdays, or my kids miss out.
I hate the idea of my kids having to miss out on something they'd really like to do because I work. I'm all for setting boundaries and having a child choose one or two activities to pursue, but in many cases, the scheduling of classes makes it so my child can't even try something he or she is interested in. Ever. If my kid never gets to try a sport or musical instrument or whatever, how is he going to know if he likes it, let alone commit to it? I at least want to give my kids a chance to try whatever it is they think they are interested in. But lately, my efforts have been coming up short.
This fall, KJ wanted to do soccer and hockey. Two sports, sounds totally do-able. Except, Saturday hockey is at the exact same time as Saturday soccer. We could change hockey rinks, but I had found a program at a new rink that introduced sticks and pucks (you know, the reason kids like hockey) much sooner than the other rink we had been using. I didn't really want to change out of that program to accommodate soccer. Plus, we had done park district soccer in the spring and it was mostly a melee of kids running after a ball. Not a lot of focus on skills or the actual game. So, I set out to find a different, more time-friendly soccer program. And I did. I found a private program that offered (what sounded like) a solid program for pre-k on Friday mornings. I already had most Fridays off, and I had already signed Sweet Pea up for dance on Fridays. Perfect.
Except, it's not perfect. Because everything I signed my kids up for on Fridays was cancelled for low enrollment. Apparently, the local pre-school program runs Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Therefore, there aren't a lot of kids around on those days and the Friday programs get cancelled. Both the private soccer club and the park district dance programs left messages at our house, offering to enroll my kids in their Tuesday (at 10 am or 1:45 pm) classes instead. Thanks.
There's no way I can be out of the office on Tuesdays. While I think it is now pretty acceptable to be out of the office on Fridays (or even Mondays), clients generally expect to be able to find you at any given time on a Tuesday. And now it's too late to change hockey rinks or find another dance class for Sweet Pea. Most classes have already started, and if they haven't, aren't offered at a time we can make anyway.
I'm frustrated at how unfriendly the world of kid activities is to working parents. I work so that we can afford things like dance lessons and soccer practice. But my kids can't go to dance lessons or soccer practice because they aren't offered at a time that accounts for two working parents. What a ridiculous situation. There's an entire market of parents with disposable income looking for programs for their kids that start at 6:30 pm. Why in the world hasn't anyone capitalized on it?
Karen
I hate the idea of my kids having to miss out on something they'd really like to do because I work. I'm all for setting boundaries and having a child choose one or two activities to pursue, but in many cases, the scheduling of classes makes it so my child can't even try something he or she is interested in. Ever. If my kid never gets to try a sport or musical instrument or whatever, how is he going to know if he likes it, let alone commit to it? I at least want to give my kids a chance to try whatever it is they think they are interested in. But lately, my efforts have been coming up short.
This fall, KJ wanted to do soccer and hockey. Two sports, sounds totally do-able. Except, Saturday hockey is at the exact same time as Saturday soccer. We could change hockey rinks, but I had found a program at a new rink that introduced sticks and pucks (you know, the reason kids like hockey) much sooner than the other rink we had been using. I didn't really want to change out of that program to accommodate soccer. Plus, we had done park district soccer in the spring and it was mostly a melee of kids running after a ball. Not a lot of focus on skills or the actual game. So, I set out to find a different, more time-friendly soccer program. And I did. I found a private program that offered (what sounded like) a solid program for pre-k on Friday mornings. I already had most Fridays off, and I had already signed Sweet Pea up for dance on Fridays. Perfect.
Except, it's not perfect. Because everything I signed my kids up for on Fridays was cancelled for low enrollment. Apparently, the local pre-school program runs Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Therefore, there aren't a lot of kids around on those days and the Friday programs get cancelled. Both the private soccer club and the park district dance programs left messages at our house, offering to enroll my kids in their Tuesday (at 10 am or 1:45 pm) classes instead. Thanks.
There's no way I can be out of the office on Tuesdays. While I think it is now pretty acceptable to be out of the office on Fridays (or even Mondays), clients generally expect to be able to find you at any given time on a Tuesday. And now it's too late to change hockey rinks or find another dance class for Sweet Pea. Most classes have already started, and if they haven't, aren't offered at a time we can make anyway.
I'm frustrated at how unfriendly the world of kid activities is to working parents. I work so that we can afford things like dance lessons and soccer practice. But my kids can't go to dance lessons or soccer practice because they aren't offered at a time that accounts for two working parents. What a ridiculous situation. There's an entire market of parents with disposable income looking for programs for their kids that start at 6:30 pm. Why in the world hasn't anyone capitalized on it?
Karen
Friday, September 16, 2011
The Soccer/Dance Mom
As a working Mom I encounter lots of challenges from both my work life and my home life. One of the most enjoyable of these challenges for me is dealing with my kids activities.
If you are a working Mom you certainly have experienced that the people who set up classes, sports, and activities do not gear these toward working Moms. I’ll never forget the first time I opened up a book from our local Y to find only about 3 Saturday or evening classes compared to the hundreds of weekday activities. And if they do schedule an evening class, the class tends to be set either right at 5:00, making it nearly impossible to beat traffic to get there after a work day, or 7:00 at night when the last thing a toddler wants to do is sit and listen. And if you do manage to find a class at a time that works for you, you have to sign up so early otherwise it is full in a blink of an eye.
Until this year, I have only had to balance the activities of one child, J. When J was three, she got really excited about different activities and before I knew it we were doing ice skating, gymnastics, cheerleading, dance, and swimming all in one fall. If I didn’t work, I might have been able to spread these classes out to make them more manageable, but with my schedule my kids are limited to taking classes in the evenings and on weekends. But this schedule was simply not working with our busy life, so I sat down J and limited her to 2 classes per session. Ever since then, our life has been more manageable.
J's main and favorite activity is dance. She loves dance class. J started dance when she was 2 years old and so for the past 3 years we spend one evening a week twirling at the dance studio. Classes started at ½ hour, moved to 45 minutes, an hour, and now our sessions are 1 ½ hours every Tuesday night. Last year, this would have been absolutely no problem, but now we have school. So Tuesday nights I rush home from work, eat whatever I threw in the crock pot that morning, get to the dance studio at 6:45 and entertain the boys for 1 ½ hours while trying to watch J execute her “first position” or a new jazz turn. Then we rush home, take a quick shower, snack, and try to get to bed before 9:00. Tuesday nights certainly go by in a whirlwind.
Even though the schedule is crazy, I must admit I love being a Dance Mom. No, I’m not a crazy dance mom like you may have seen on one of my new favorite shows, Dance Moms, but yes I'm a proud dance Mom. I love watching J get excited every time she learns a new move, or the look in her eyes when she is on stage. I’m the kind of Dance Mom that watches closely in the window, smiles and “air claps” when she does something great and of course snaps a picture or two. This year is J’s last year of non-competitive dancing. After this, we move into the world of competitive dancing, which I can only imagine will be an adventure.
But now, my world has changed in that there is a new participant in the world of activities…my son H. H has a November birthday and so we have had to wait a long time for him to hit the age where he can start sports. Of course my sports-loving husband, who was thrown for a loop when his first child was the girliest of girly girls and refused to play sports has been waiting for H to start a sport. So now that he is 3 this summer we have started soccer and I have joined the world of the Soccer Mom.
H is a shy little guy, and so when we started soccer, I was sure that he would hide behind me and not participate. Boy was I wrong. H LOVES soccer and is really good at it. From the moment we hit the field, its “Bye Mommy” and off he goes scoring goals and running all around.
I knew I would love to watch H play sports as I grew up watching my two brothers play every sport under the sun. But I had absolutely no idea how much fun it would be to watch my son play. Unlike my Dance Mom persona who is calm collected and “air claps”, my Soccer Mom persona is the complete opposite. I stand on the sidelines yelling “GO H!!” and jump out of my chair with every goal. I’m having a blast watching my little guy join the world of sports.
However, a part of me knows as I watch H run the field, that life is about to get much more difficult now that he is up and running (literally) on activities. Now in addition to managing the schedule of Diva J, I have to manage sports loving H. And then I keep staring at L tottering around the sidelines and I realize in a few years I’ll have three kids with who knows how many activities. My schedule now is nothing compared to what I'll have in just three short years!
So my plan is to just enjoy my time as a Dance Mom, Soccer Mom, and whatever else Mom I become. The schedules will all work themselves out, and if they don’t…I’ll just trade in our mini-van for an RV and live on the road!!
Mandi
If you are a working Mom you certainly have experienced that the people who set up classes, sports, and activities do not gear these toward working Moms. I’ll never forget the first time I opened up a book from our local Y to find only about 3 Saturday or evening classes compared to the hundreds of weekday activities. And if they do schedule an evening class, the class tends to be set either right at 5:00, making it nearly impossible to beat traffic to get there after a work day, or 7:00 at night when the last thing a toddler wants to do is sit and listen. And if you do manage to find a class at a time that works for you, you have to sign up so early otherwise it is full in a blink of an eye.
Until this year, I have only had to balance the activities of one child, J. When J was three, she got really excited about different activities and before I knew it we were doing ice skating, gymnastics, cheerleading, dance, and swimming all in one fall. If I didn’t work, I might have been able to spread these classes out to make them more manageable, but with my schedule my kids are limited to taking classes in the evenings and on weekends. But this schedule was simply not working with our busy life, so I sat down J and limited her to 2 classes per session. Ever since then, our life has been more manageable.
Even though the schedule is crazy, I must admit I love being a Dance Mom. No, I’m not a crazy dance mom like you may have seen on one of my new favorite shows, Dance Moms, but yes I'm a proud dance Mom. I love watching J get excited every time she learns a new move, or the look in her eyes when she is on stage. I’m the kind of Dance Mom that watches closely in the window, smiles and “air claps” when she does something great and of course snaps a picture or two. This year is J’s last year of non-competitive dancing. After this, we move into the world of competitive dancing, which I can only imagine will be an adventure.
But now, my world has changed in that there is a new participant in the world of activities…my son H. H has a November birthday and so we have had to wait a long time for him to hit the age where he can start sports. Of course my sports-loving husband, who was thrown for a loop when his first child was the girliest of girly girls and refused to play sports has been waiting for H to start a sport. So now that he is 3 this summer we have started soccer and I have joined the world of the Soccer Mom.
I knew I would love to watch H play sports as I grew up watching my two brothers play every sport under the sun. But I had absolutely no idea how much fun it would be to watch my son play. Unlike my Dance Mom persona who is calm collected and “air claps”, my Soccer Mom persona is the complete opposite. I stand on the sidelines yelling “GO H!!” and jump out of my chair with every goal. I’m having a blast watching my little guy join the world of sports.
So my plan is to just enjoy my time as a Dance Mom, Soccer Mom, and whatever else Mom I become. The schedules will all work themselves out, and if they don’t…I’ll just trade in our mini-van for an RV and live on the road!!
Mandi
Thursday, March 17, 2011
I Love March!
Happy St. Patrick’s Day!! It is set to be a beautiful day and I, for once, don’t have any meetings over lunch, so I can go watch the parade at noon – woo hoo!! Or…I can head to lunch and watch something much more exciting…
Yes, folks, it is that wonderful time of year again. It’s tourney time baby (and say it like Dickie V would!)! No serious, thought-provoking post today. Nope – I have spent way too much time agonizing over my bracket to even think about a meaningful topic. And have I chosen correctly? Will my 12 pick over the 5 seed really win? Who will be the Cinderella team this year? All these questions and much more to be revealed on CBS over the coming weeks!
Whether you are a college hoops fan or not, March Madness® cannot be ignored. It changes our TV viewing schedules, topics of discussion around the “water cooler,” and top articles in the newspaper. Luckily, my family LOVES college hoops, so we are excited for March (even if my team is not in it!). And, I slyly try to work in some “learning” during the games. Such as identifying numbers and names on the scoreboard, or working on time using the shot clock. Plus, spelling also comes into play with “I-L-L-I-N-I!”
So what does your family do to celebrate? Do you have everyone fill out the brackets and whoever wins gets a prize/bragging rights? Are you sporting your favorite team colors or jerseys? (This was difficult today for my hubby, as he is a Wisconsin Badger fan, but had to wear green for St. Paddy’s Day!) Did you take the day off work to watch the games?
Well, whether you are a “Rock Chalk Jayhawk” or one of the “Cameron Crazies,” enjoy the fun! And next year, let’s hope the BU Braves can make a run for the MVC tourney title!
Jean Anne
Yes, folks, it is that wonderful time of year again. It’s tourney time baby (and say it like Dickie V would!)! No serious, thought-provoking post today. Nope – I have spent way too much time agonizing over my bracket to even think about a meaningful topic. And have I chosen correctly? Will my 12 pick over the 5 seed really win? Who will be the Cinderella team this year? All these questions and much more to be revealed on CBS over the coming weeks!
Whether you are a college hoops fan or not, March Madness® cannot be ignored. It changes our TV viewing schedules, topics of discussion around the “water cooler,” and top articles in the newspaper. Luckily, my family LOVES college hoops, so we are excited for March (even if my team is not in it!). And, I slyly try to work in some “learning” during the games. Such as identifying numbers and names on the scoreboard, or working on time using the shot clock. Plus, spelling also comes into play with “I-L-L-I-N-I!”
So what does your family do to celebrate? Do you have everyone fill out the brackets and whoever wins gets a prize/bragging rights? Are you sporting your favorite team colors or jerseys? (This was difficult today for my hubby, as he is a Wisconsin Badger fan, but had to wear green for St. Paddy’s Day!) Did you take the day off work to watch the games?
Well, whether you are a “Rock Chalk Jayhawk” or one of the “Cameron Crazies,” enjoy the fun! And next year, let’s hope the BU Braves can make a run for the MVC tourney title!
Jean Anne
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